Bikini - eBay Sandals - inkrush

Well hello everyone! It's being like what, 2 years since I have blogged!!! Its has been a nightmare, someone hacked my blog, but I have managed to get it back, thank god!

My photos are not all the same size I know, as I said I haven't done it in a while and everything I used to use to edit my photos has changed :( so please bare with me!

Anyway I really wanted to do a post on body confidence! This is hard for me as I have always suffered with body dysmorphia and went through a time when I was younger of not eating but we'll not get into that. I always look in the mirror and see something so much bigger staring back at me, but then look on photos and see something completely different and its so strange, I never know which one is real!

I did a bikini post on here a few years ago now and I am a stone heavier than when those was taken, I couldn't see back then that I was way too skinny and underweight , yet I still thought I was big and thats what body dysmorphia is, it tricks you into seeing something thats not there.

I have a lot of chronic illnesses which I think I may have already gone into a some point on a post somewhere, however I'll quickly highlight them.

I have POTS (Postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome) It takes so long to explain what this is so if you're interested then have a google. From this blood pools in my feet and everyday I pass out at some point of the day, whether this be just once or 10 times! its always changing, when I was 7 stone, I thought I looked better, but boy was I unhealthy, I just couldn't stay off the floor, I had no energy and was also getting horrendous seizures. I finally decided things had to change so I went on a contraceptive injection to help me gain weight and it did, I put a stone on, which made me a lot healthier cause being underweight just makes my condition a hell of a lot worse. Obviously with this weight gain things got bigger, legs, arms, tummy etc and I started to suffer with my mind again, the whole of last summer I covered up, in long skirt, dresses, even wore long sarongs on the beach as I thought I looked disgusting.

I had a counselling and have been working hard on learning to love my body the way it is and even though I'm not fully there yet I am in a much better place than I was a year ago and thats the reason for this post!

To show that no ones perfect and everyone has bits of their body they don't like, but as long as we are healthy thats all that matters!

I'm 8 stone now and I have stretch marks and cellulite which I thought made me look awful but our bodies are all beautiful and we need to wear them with confidence!

I wanted to show that if you suffer really bad with body image it is possible to overcome that and feel amazing and confidence in your own skin!

Love,

Lo 

x